I dont like this. 

Well, who does actually. Failing subjects and knowing that the chinese O's are just months away. future seems pretty bleak.

never thought i would fail english. not now. 

i guess, that was the greatest worry. i must never fail english! i couldn't! and yet, i FAILED!

to make things worse, Jan and Shuyi both passed.

I felt pressured at that time. I didnt know what to say. 

i turned to look at ramdan. he will never be there for me again.

Literature was a pass, thank god. however, i didnt do well, screwing up in paper 1, especially in impression of scout. Tell me, what more, since my best friend who i look up to for lit ignores me now? no, he doesnt ignore me. He's pissed at me.

How can he care seriously for me as a bestie if he doesnt bother to share his troubles, and insists that i would not understand. How can i understand if he doesn't explain?

went out with Daryl today. Was not really looking forward to it at first, as i was feeling light head-ed from all the results. 

in the end, went out with him. i was late, felt so sorry. maybe it wasnt meant to be. 

was supposed to accompany him to study, distracted him instead. :(

Then, walked home, he came home with me, watched lame vids and took photos. 

why the fuck do i like spending time with him! CANNOT! i told myself already. cannot fall for you. cannot. i dont want the friendship to be over. 

Its like, history repeating itself with more obstacles for me to cross.